Be Yourself Episode 18 Recap
> Be Yourself Recap
Huangfu's mother called her "Baby girl," asking about her flight arrangements home and promising to make her favorite Stir-fried Shredded Eel with Hot Oil. However, Huangfu informed her mother that she wouldn't be returning home for the summer, opting instead to take a Latin dance class near her school. Her mother, who hadn't seen her daughter in six months and missed her dearly, insisted that Latin dance could be learned anywhere and urged Huangfu to come back to Shanghai.
Huangfu dismissively reminded her mother that they video-chatted daily. Later, Xia Langlang entered, cheerfully greeting Huangfu's mother and mentioning that she, Fan Xiaoyu, and others were planning an outing to Fan Xiaoyu's father's resort in the suburbs the next day. This revelation immediately heightened Huangfu's mother's anxiety. She warned Huangfu about the dangers of traveling to the suburbs, citing news reports of bus accidents and the risk of landslides in Chongqing's mountainous, rainy region.
She also brought up Huangfu's premature birth, calling her "congenitally deficient" and recalling her month-long stay in an incubator. Huangfu, frustrated, quickly hung up the phone and then angrily retorted to Xia Langlang, "Xia Langlang, you're the one who's congenitally deficient!" Xia Langlang then asked Huangfu if she would mind Zhou Yu joining them for the outing to take photos. Huangfu pretended indifference, but a subtle smile played on her lips, betraying her true feelings.
The next day, on the school bus, Huangfu and Zhou Yu's eyes met, creating an awkward silence. Observing the scene, Xia Langlang and Yang Jiaqian exchanged smiles, secretly hoping the outing would help the two reconcile. At the beautiful resort, Fan Xiaoyu praised her father's venue and thanked him for the invitation. After taking group photos by a peacock, Huangfu asked Zhou Yu to take some solo shots of her. However, Zhou Yu deliberately took blurry photos, teasing her.
When Yang Jiaqian received the photos, she exclaimed, "What's this? Why is mine so blurred?" She showed Huangfu the photos where Huangfu was clearly out of focus. Huangfu, annoyed, then joined Yang Jiaqian, Xia Langlang, and Fan Xiaoyu to order food in a private room, leaving Zhou Yu behind.
While looking at the menu, Huangfu expressed her disgust for chufa juice, recounting how her mother used to force her to drink it daily as a child until she developed a "physiological reaction" to the word "chufa." She also complained about her mother's "dozens of super-long 60-second voice messages every day."
Yang Jiaqian then revealed that Huangfu's mother not only bombarded Huangfu but also them, frequently sending WeChat messages to inquire about Huangfu's well-being and suggesting she should install "surveillance in our dorm so she could monitor you real-time." Huangfu was utterly shocked and embarrassed to learn her mother had been contacting her friends. As the weather turned rainy, their phones ran out of battery.
Yang Jiaqian received an urgent call from Mr. Mai, who informed her that Huangfu's father couldn't reach Huangfu because her mother was sick. Mr. Mai asked Yang Jiaqian to tell Huangfu to return home immediately. Huangfu's father also asked to keep the information from her mother, whom he described as "sensitive," and implored Huangfu to "be happy in front of her" to maintain her mother's spirits, as her mood could affect the treatment's outcome.
On the bus ride home, Huangfu stared out the window, her mind racing with worry and suspicion. Her roommates expressed their concern. Zhou Yu attempted to comfort her, but Huangfu silently rebuffed his advances. Taking the first available flight, Huangfu arrived home to find her mother waiting at the door, embracing her tightly and expressing immense joy, saying her "sixth sense told me that my baby girl was coming home!"
Her mother's usual incessant chatter quickly resumed, recalling her worries about Chongqing's heavy rain. Huangfu noticed her mother wearing a discarded dress of hers, which her mother proudly declared "this little floral pattern flatters me." Huangfu's mother continued to worry about Huangfu's weight, believing she was "emaciated" from dieting. As her mother bustled around, Huangfu noticed her slowing down, and her mother commented on her recent lack of stamina.
Huangfu offered to clean the cooker hood, a task her father joked she usually made "look like a painted face." Her mother was surprised by Huangfu's sudden initiative, remarking, "You suddenly became so sensible. Somehow mom feels it weird." Later, while her mother was cooking, Huangfu asked her father about her mother's condition. He explained that a CT scan revealed lung tumors, and due to their location, surgery was not an option, and chemotherapy was the only treatment.
He reiterated his imploration to Huangfu to keep the diagnosis a secret from his "sensitive" wife and "be happy in front of her" to maintain her mother's spirits, as her mood could affect the treatment's outcome. Huangfu, filled with worry, reluctantly nodded. The next day, Huangfu went to the hospital alone to complete her mother Ruan Jinhong's admission procedures.
She requested the doctor keep the diagnosis of "Stage IV of poorly differentiated lung cancer" a secret from her mother, emphasizing that her mother's mood was crucial for the treatment. The doctor agreed to cooperate. At this time, her mother still believed it was a minor illness and was excitedly talking on the phone with friends. After the evening rounds, Huangfu secretly came out of the hospital bathroom and squeezed onto the bed with her mother.
They talked about childhood memories, and Huangfu felt her mother's heartbeat, her thoughts drifting out the window. Upon returning home, Huangfu was startled to find Zhou Yu sitting with her parents, being barraged with questions about his photography major, career prospects, and past relationships. Zhou Yu, flustered, tried to answer, eventually declaring he was "honored" to be Huangfu's "first love."
Her mother even inquired about his family's financial status, mistakenly thinking his parents were divorced when he mentioned they each owned a house. Zhou Yu clarified he was an "only child" and his family owned multiple properties. Huangfu, seeing Zhou Yu overwhelmed, quickly found an excuse to take him away. Outside, Huangfu broke down, confiding in Zhou Yu about her guilt and helplessness.
She recounted her first failed attempt to cook steamed egg custard for her mother, admitting she "didn't even know how to cook steamed egg custard for my mother," and realizing she didn't even know what her mother liked to eat. Zhou Yu, who had been staying at a nearby hotel to support her, brought an array of health supplements and lemons (as air fresheners) for her mother.
During a visit to the hospital, he learned that Huangfu's mother had a craving for sweets and, with a pinky swear, promised to bring her some White Rabbit Toffee, keeping it a secret between them. After the first course of chemotherapy, Huangfu's mother was discharged from the hospital. To celebrate, Zhou Yu learned Shanghai-style Mahjong, playing with "small bets" (five cents and one yuan) and deliberately losing to ensure Huangfu's mother enjoyed her win.
The next morning, Huangfu discovered Zhou Yu in the kitchen, diligently learning her mother's recipes, which included ingredients like chufa, sugarcane, red dates, and ginger shreds. Her mother shared life advice with Zhou Yu, likening a relationship to the blend of ingredients, emphasizing the need to "tolerate each other and make compromises sometimes" to "become a family" and "spend life together."
She also confided in Zhou Yu, describing Huangfu's flaws (delicate, willful, prone to tantrums) and asking him that if "one day that you don't want to tolerate her and you don't want to maintain this relationship anymore, please break up with her nicely and try not to hurt her feelings as much as you can." Huangfu, overhearing this, felt a mix of emotions, a bit melancholic.
Later, during a family outing to the park, Huangfu's mother reminisced about Huangfu's childhood, recalling how Huangfu happily ran around the park and once insisted on feeding fish from a bench, much to her mother's alarm. While her father and Zhou Yu went to buy popsicles, her mother held Huangfu's hand. She apologized for being "overprotecting" and expressed relief in Huangfu's newfound maturity.
She then revealed that she had known about her lung cancer diagnosis all along, having experienced a similar situation when nursing her own mother through cancer. She admitted to feeling "not resigned to die yet," longing to witness Huangfu's graduation, marriage, and the birth of her grandchildren, promising to "stick to it to the end." She also urged Huangfu to spend more time with her father. Huangfu, still in denial, told her mother, "You are his wife.
You should keep him company, and keep him company for a long time." Her mother then playfully recounted how Zhou Yu had boasted about owning five houses in Chongqing, expressing her desire to visit and see if he was telling the truth. At the memorial service, Huangfu's father, overwhelmed with grief, was unable to deliver his eulogy.
He managed to say that he and his wife "got married when we were both poor and we've been spending the next twenty-six years together" and that because of her, "Our family always had suitable clothes at home and food on the table." Huangfu stepped forward, taking the microphone. She tearfully shared anecdotes about her mother, admitting her own "Princess's Syndrome" was "inherited from my mother."
She described her mother's quick temper – how she would get angry if Huangfu didn't drink her chufa juice, return calls, or come home for holidays – but also her easy forgiveness. Huangfu affectionately recalled her mother's love for gossip, her joy in cooking a feast for her and her father, and her insistence on compliments, even if the food was "a bit too salty" or had "no taste at all."
She also remembered her mother's domineering habits, such as never knocking before entering her room and "forcing me to wear long johns" every fall. Through her tears, Huangfu confessed that it was only yesterday she truly understood that the "person who loved me most in this world was going to leave me forever," and how truly difficult that was. She concluded with a poignant thought: "No one would force me to wear long johns anymore."
Friends and relatives bowed in respect. Zhou Yu, his expression solemn, placed a White Rabbit Toffee in front of her mother's portrait, honoring their secret promise. In the quiet aftermath of the funeral, Huangfu found Zhou Yu in the kitchen, meticulously learning to cook Stir-fried Shredded Eel with Hot Oil from a recipe. She then saw her father standing silently on the balcony.
Her father told her, "Nannan, from now on, it'll just be the two of us, depending on each other." Remembering her mother's parting words about taking care of her father, Huangfu embraced him tightly. Despite realizing she never truly knew her mother's favorite dish, Huangfu found comfort in listening to her mother's old voice messages saved on her phone, pressing the receiver tightly to her ear, feeling as though her mother's love was still ever-present.
The junior year's summer vacation marked the "hardest farewell" for Huangfu, and "that proud and innocent little princess seemed to have grown up overnight." As her senior year began, Huangfu resolved to embark on a new chapter, continuing to find solace in her mother's recorded voice whenever she missed her.
Back at school, during a conversation with her roommates, Huangfu broke down in tears, lamenting that she had not had the chance to ask her mother what she truly liked to eat before she passed, as she finally processed the profound loss.
